I need wiper blades ... fast!

[Robin Garr]

It's a little known fact that a stick shift gets you additional cylinder points. Trust me on this.
'Winger

Ah, good! That brings me up to five! (I assume the shifter buys me only one?)

Well it is in Oldham Co but I admit, my heart is in Diversityville!

Carla,

I once knew a guy from Diversityville...Nice guy but damn was he hard to understand. Kept using words like: Enabler and Bonding and Empower and Connectivity. He called what we were having "Dialogue" (we say "conversation" here in the town of GL). But if that's where your hearts at...then that's where your hearts at. BTW, just as an aside...everyone is welcome here in the town of Garage Logic, we just refuse to recognize anyone as belonging to "victim class".

It's a little known fact that a stick shift gets you additional cylinder points. Trust me on this.
'Winger

Ah, good! That brings me up to five! (I assume the shifter buys me only one?)

Once knew a guy with a "C.I." (cylinder index) of 48...and he wasn't even a farmer. It is said here in Garage Logic that anyone who has a C.I. equal to their age should be held in great esteem. Unfortunately since the majority of the population is of that age where curmudgeondom sets in, this doesn't happen too often. I mean can you see me...a 54 year old with 54 cylinders ? I just don't have the room in the garage.

I mean can you see me...a 54 year old with 54 cylinders ? I just don't have the room in the garage.

Strange , my garage has gotten larger with age. No wait... that's my back porch!

Between...

Caaaaarrrrrllllaaaaa ... coooome toooo theeeee liiiiiiigggghhhhttttttt ....

and...

I once knew a guy from Diversityville...Nice guy but damn was he hard to understand. Kept using words like: Enabler and Bonding and Empower and Connectivity. He called what we were having "Dialogue" (we say "conversation" here in the town of GL). But if that's where your hearts at...then that's where your hearts at.

You guys are cracking me up. And this...

BTW, just as an aside...everyone is welcome here in the town of Garage Logic, we just refuse to recognize anyone as belonging to "victim class".

should be a law anyway.

You guys are cracking me up. And this...

BTW, just as an aside...everyone is welcome here in the town of Garage Logic, we just refuse to recognize anyone as belonging to "victim class".

should be a law anyway.

Carla,

I think you'd really like it out here in Garage Logic...we solve all our problems (either) in the garage over a couple of beers and stogy or a cup of coffee down at Wrench's Automotive Repair and Diner. If you've got a REAL problem, you can always track down the Mayor, he's always got time on his hands since the only thing he's in charge of is the annual Garage Logic 4th of July fireworks show.

I love fireworks!

Steve,
My neighbor who is a "farmer", only to the extent he owns 5 horses and rents out some acreage to others for cutting hay, has a C.I. index of at least 56 and perhaps other misc. items in his multiple barns, sheds, I'm overlooking. Among his stash are 4 cars and pickups, a motorhome, two tractors, a powerwasher, 2 ATVs, a Gator, two commercial grade lawn mowers, chain saw, power auger. leaf blower, log splitter. They they all are operational...not bad for a 50 year old guy. I like neighbors with lots of stuff, so I don't have to buy lots of stuff.
Curiously, I've given him the nickname of "Mayor".

Steve,
My neighbor who is a "farmer", only to the extent he owns 5 horses and rents out some acreage to others for cutting hay, has a C.I. index of at least 56 and perhaps other misc. items in his multiple barns, sheds, I'm overlooking. Among his stash are 4 cars and pickups, a motorhome, two tractors, a powerwasher, 2 ATVs, a Gator, two commercial grade lawn mowers, chain saw, power auger. leaf blower, log splitter. They they all are operational...not bad for a 50 year old guy. I like neighbors with lots of stuff, so I don't have to buy lots of stuff.
Curiously, I've given him the nickname of "Mayor".

This man is to be revered. Anytime your C.I. exceeds your age, it's a good thing. If he has "Auto Zone" on speed dial it means he is god-like.

Steve,
My neighbor who is a "farmer", only to the extent he owns 5 horses and rents out some acreage to others for cutting hay, has a C.I. index of at least 56 and perhaps other misc. items in his multiple barns, sheds, I'm overlooking. Among his stash are 4 cars and pickups, a motorhome, two tractors, a powerwasher, 2 ATVs, a Gator, two commercial grade lawn mowers, chain saw, power auger. leaf blower, log splitter. They they all are operational...not bad for a 50 year old guy. I like neighbors with lots of stuff, so I don't have to buy lots of stuff.
Curiously, I've given him the nickname of "Mayor".

This man is to be revered. Anytime your C.I. exceeds your age, it's a good thing. If he has "Auto Zone" on speed dial it means he is god-like.

.
Oh, and I forgot to mention his I/O boat

Steve,
My neighbor who is a "farmer", only to the extent he owns 5 horses and rents out some acreage to others for cutting hay, has a C.I. index of at least 56 and perhaps other misc. items in his multiple barns, sheds, I'm overlooking. Among his stash are 4 cars and pickups, a motorhome, two tractors, a powerwasher, 2 ATVs, a Gator, two commercial grade lawn mowers, chain saw, power auger. leaf blower, log splitter. They they all are operational...not bad for a 50 year old guy. I like neighbors with lots of stuff, so I don't have to buy lots of stuff.
Curiously, I've given him the nickname of "Mayor".

This man is to be revered. Anytime your C.I. exceeds your age, it's a good thing. If he has "Auto Zone" on speed dial it means he is god-like.

.
Oh, and I forgot to mention his I/O boat

Dude...you need to stop. I'm getting cylinder envy.

3 cylinder diesel tractor
8 cylinder jeep
6 cylinder van
6 cylinder step van
6 cylinder box truck
6 cylinder jeep
4 cylinder forklift
6 cylinder forklift
1 cylinder moped ( I hope having a moped doesn’t count against my total)
10 cylinders misc (generators,mower,weedeater,pumps,chainsaw)

56….not too bad,and Im pretty sure Im forgetting a few engines here.

3 cylinder diesel tractor
8 cylinder jeep
6 cylinder van
6 cylinder step van
6 cylinder box truck
6 cylinder jeep
4 cylinder forklift
6 cylinder forklift
1 cylinder moped ( I hope having a moped doesn’t count against my total)
10 cylinders misc (generators,mower,weedeater,pumps,chainsaw)

56….not too bad,and Im pretty sure Im forgetting a few engines here.

We are not worthy! We are now worthy!

3 cylinder diesel tractor
8 cylinder jeep
6 cylinder van
6 cylinder step van
6 cylinder box truck
6 cylinder jeep
4 cylinder forklift
6 cylinder forklift
1 cylinder moped ( I hope having a moped doesn’t count against my total)
10 cylinders misc (generators,mower,weedeater,pumps,chainsaw)

56….not too bad,and Im pretty sure Im forgetting a few engines here.

Dude, I'm gonna have to check with the Mayor and see if any/all of those business cylinders (B.C.) are transferable to one's personal C.I. Regardless of the decision that is one impressive array of cylinders. Fork lift huh ? I like.

3 cylinder diesel tractor
8 cylinder jeep
6 cylinder van
6 cylinder step van
6 cylinder box truck
6 cylinder jeep
4 cylinder forklift
6 cylinder forklift
1 cylinder moped ( I hope having a moped doesn’t count against my total)
10 cylinders misc (generators,mower,weedeater,pumps,chainsaw)

56….not too bad,and Im pretty sure Im forgetting a few engines here.

OK...So I ran into the Mayor down at the hardware store. He says that since the cylinders are located on the same property you use for your residence that they count toward your personal C.I. BTW, the mayor was impressed and is considering nominating you for this year's "Piston" awards.