Do you ever take it personally?

This is a bit of a rant so please be patient. With our son out of town for the month at camp, my wife and I have been eatting out more. Our normal is 3 nights out a week and last week it was 5 or 6, I lost count. Anyway we decided visit a frequently praised restaurant - we've had dinner here 3 or 4 times in the past year but it had been a good 6 months since our last visit. Food and service have always been very good to sublime. We went on Friday night and the place was about half full. The service was fine although the waiter made it clear this was a temporary gig for him.

The issue for us was the food. It just wasn't good. Maybe we hit them on an off night or maybe we picked the "wrong" menu items. The appetizer was small, tastless, and frankly lame. My wife had a seafood dish that did not taste fresh. My dish tasted like it had been incompletely warmed up. The saving grace was a nice creme brulee and a good bottle of pinot noir. I've been vague because I don't want to post something this negative about a place that is a forum favorite - I doubt many here would belive me if I did. The rub - I can take a a dish that is not to my liking - I just won't order that again. But this was poorly prepared and in my wife's case barely edible. I'm not sure I want to ever go back and I'm not sure my wife would consider it anyway. We kind of feel cheated in a way, like a relationship gone bad. We talked about it all weekend. Do we forgive and forget or is this a harbinger of things to come? Rant over.

Positive recent experiences:

The steak and frites at Le Releis is sublime. I mean a really really good steak!

The foie gras appetizer at Seviche has crack in it. I'm getting a double portion next time.

The Steele Wine dinner at Corbett's was excellant. The food surpassed the wines; however, I did buy a case in a weak moment.

I suppose I'm with AnneMarie on this. In retrospect probably the best thing that you could have done was to politely bring it to the managers attention. We had a similar experience at a Minneapolis restaurant and when I brought it to the managers attention they were quick to try and make amends. (They weren't successful the second time around either but that is beside the point). Be curious to see how/if any of the "industry insiders" respond to this question.

question. did you let this be known to the manager? if one doesn't bring it to their attention, then how are they supposed to know if the food was not up to par. i guess you didn't because it seems it was the topic over the weekend. i know this must have been a downer for you and your wife, since this place has a good reputation. maybe if was an off day. still no excuse on their part. i would go back and give it another try. but at that time i would be discussing the prior experience with the manager. this way when the food comes out, they will make sure it has the high standards they are known for. lately i have noticed the quality going a bit down in some of the highly praised restaurants.

Normally I would speak to someone. If it's one specific issue that's easy. This was less specific to any one item and frankly we kept asking ourselves if it was us. I didn't feel I could say that basically the whole meal sorta sucked.

I've some concerns that if business is slowing down then turnover in products will slow down and quality will suffer.

I am glad you mentioned this because I never know what to do if I get food that I just don't like. I never have a problem saying anything if the food is prepared incorrectly, its cold, or if there is obviously something amiss, but I never know if I should say something if the food is just not good. 99% of the time I just eat (or don't eat) the meal and leave unsatisfied. In the future should I say something?

I've tried things and didn't like them; even though they were cooked ok. However, the restaurant sometimes offered to replace it with another dish. Now, this is going to vary , but I've seen it occur. It's a question of customer service and/or nice you're going to be about it. If you take a few bites and say it's cooked ok, but not something you're fond; I wager you'll have a better chance of getting a replacement dish than being surly or eating the entire dish and THEN complaining about it.

If it's something I order often and this time the quality is not good, then I'll ask to speak to a manager; let them know I do order it and tonight it wasn't good because of *insert reason*. Now, MOST, managers/employees will be ok to hear someone "complain" about their meal; as long as that person is not degrading in the process.

Have some respect, people. I don't come to your office and yell at your desk because there is no TPS cover sheet on your reports.

We want to know. We really do. I swear we want to know if the meal is good or not. As an owner, I can not taste everything every night, so I rely on what the customers say. I know it is hard for some people to "confront" the manager or owner but if we do not know that something is wrong, then how can we fix it? I have tried being a mind reader but for some reason it does not work...ask my kids. Undercooked, over cooked, not fresh, cold, all of those are no brainers. Chances are that if you are not satisfied with your meal, the restaurant will try to make it up to you in some way.

Now that being said, if someone orders blackened fish and then tells me that it is too spicy I have to explain that , yes it is. I will still try and make it better.
So please tell your server, tell your busser, tell your manager and owner... tell someone. don't just go away.
Nothing worse than wondering -what ever happened to so and so..they used to come in every week....

As someone who cooks for a living. YES we absolutely want to know the bad with the good and prefer details... and sometimes I do take it personally. I have found as of late that cooking as with any art can be very subjective. However if you order something and that is down right wrong communicate this with your server or mgmt. Will hit the nail on the head.

Mark, I second Will's response. I can understand not wanting a confrontation and sometimes so much goes wrong with a meal that one just wants to get out- but there is no way to correct something if no feedback is received. Just a short note or email to the owner is all that is needed. It will not make your situation better but might help others in the future.
Fois Gras and crack! I really must get back to Seviche.

Of course people want to know. My point is some owners lack the capacity to listen. Yes, it helps to hear it from people because it'll help improve your production in the future. I get it. I've worked in restaurants. I've also worked in ones where owners/managers lack a brain cell and refuse to listen to the most important people. The customers. And, none of these restaurants are currently in operation.

in my opinion..... as a chef we tend to do things to our liking but you have to realize not everyone is going to appreciate a certain dish. Making ammends is the answer. Always think of the guest before you decide to put something on the menu. I cant tell you how many times I have learned to not do things just my way. appeal to the public....to appease the public...and never say NO!

Thanks for all the professional and non-professional input alike. We will go back and I'll have a talk with the manager this week. In all honesty after 3 glasses of wine I didn't feel like bringing this up the other night at the restaurant. I feel a bit better in terms of apprehensions about speaking up - thanks to all.

I hope you will let us know the outcome, Mark. It's never easy to complain, especially at a place you've grown fond of, but it is usually well worth it in the long run.

This issue (if it really ever was one) has been resolved. Thanks to everyone for sound advise.