Why Your Waiter Hates You

[Robin Garr]

The snarky title turns to a deeper analysis of restaurant-business economics. Click, read, and comment!

Why Your Waiter Hates You
Faking it is the new feudalism. Why the low pay and job insecurity that come with “emotional work” is creating a nation full of phonies.

Full story:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2 ... s-you.html

The only conclusion that I draw is that that dude shouldn't be in the hospitality industry. His idea that servers need the freedom to be rude is a non starter. Rudeness is never an option.

The whole idea that manners should be optional and you don't want to be a fake is absurd. Had I wrote something like that, Momma would've yanked my ear and told me that manners are what makes us civilized!

[Robin Garr]

Momma would've yanked my ear and told me that manners are what makes us civilized!

Hey! Are we related?

I certainly agree with your position Steve! Combining that with how you worded it was the perfect answer!

The only conclusion that I draw is that that dude shouldn't be in the hospitality industry. His idea that servers need the freedom to be rude is a non starter. Rudeness is never an option.

The whole idea that manners should be optional and you don't want to be a fake is absurd. Had I wrote something like that, Momma would've yanked my ear and told me that manners are what makes us civilized!

+1 (and a bunch of flowers too.)

Taking the "customer" and the "service" out of "customer service" in one fell swoop. Well done.

People who dont enjoy hospitality should not work in the service industry ! Its not just about tips and money . It needs to be a job u enjoy because u know the people u are working for ( the customer ) is somebody u can show a enjoyable experience . Which gives me great satisfaction ,. Pays my bills and lets me meet some very very interesting people! Good ,bad , famous , that u would not probably ever meet at most jobs !

The snarky title turns to a deeper analysis of restaurant-business economics. Click, read, and comment!

Why Your Waiter Hates You
Faking it is the new feudalism. Why the low pay and job insecurity that come with “emotional work” is creating a nation full of phonies.

Full story:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2 ... s-you.html

That whole article is a new bullcrap millennial/hipster/20-something take on life. Just had a debate on the same thing with a female blogger today.

According to her to suddenly stop responding to text message, while in the middle of a polite text based conversation is perfectly acceptable and anyone who gets upset by that is an entitled misogynistic jerk. What I tried to convey to her is that it was bad manners.
As a 42 year old who grew up talking to people face to face or actually using the phone to talk on, if a person simply walked off from you in the middle of a conversation or hung up on you, it was considered rude. If you needed to stop the conversation (we are talking normal non-emergency here) you would say something like, "Hey its been great talking but I really have to get going" or something similar.
The fact you are carrying on the conversation via text messaging doesnt or shouldnt matter. The medium doesnt matter. Suddenly ignoring someone is rude, its bad manners. If you need to stop the conversation you are engaged in via text, you should do something similar to a phone conversation, and simply write "Hey got to go, boss yelling", or "Hey just pulled up to grocery store, Talk later".

This author is making the same argument. Because 90% of female waiters get sexually harassed on occasion by rude male patrons, this makes all polite business conversation "fake" and some form of "feudalism"? Expecting politeness is entitlement? Thats utterly absurd. Im an asshole by nature, but in conducting business other people shouldnt have to bear the burden of dealing with my normal abrasive personality, whether Im the waiter or the customer. In either case both parties should be polite.

I agree with you Doug. There seems to be an on going notion (idea-feeling-attitude ) that anyone can simply say, " hey, it's not my fault I'm __________ ( insert current social fad here.) " we seem to want to blame some uncontrollable state for everything unsavory that we do rather than copping to our own short comings and working on them.

Me? (Speaking personally) Well...
I'm fat because I don't exercise enough not because I am anemic or gluten intolerant. ( Although that may contribute to it.)
I am grumpy and abrupt because sometimes I am an ass and can be thoughtless not just because I didn't get enough sleep.
The list goes on. You get my point.
I've got many shortcomings and trust me, I am working on all of them. In the mean time I will be polite and use manners because I needn't inflict my flaws on others. Not because I live in a feudal system.
Of course when sexually harassed I do tend to forget my manners and give some clod both barrels. And yes I did that when I was a bartender and a food server because some things just aren't worth the money to overlook. And I doubt I will stop that.