Yet another tipping question

And, somewhat related, what common service flaws would motivate you to move the tip down?

I won't call this "a common service flaw" (and for that matter only marginally service related) but twice in the past year I have (after being seated) gotten up and completely removed myself from a servers section based solely on the appearance of the server. While I will acknowledge an individuals freedom of expression, I too have the freedom to express myself. If you're a server and you show up at my table looking like some Amazon Delta pigmy/tribesman don't get your panties in a wad when I get up and move to another section. Simply put I don't find a combination of "dual sleeve" tatts, "life saver" earrings and eyebrow/tongue studs even remotely conducive to my dining experience.

Hear Hear, I freely admit that I am "gaugist" a word I made up!! I HATE gauges, particularly when they aren't wearing any and the hole in their ears varies from the size of a walnut to a peach. I, too would move seats if I were confronted with that.

Wow, start scanning the tipping thread and I find out that pygmies are revolting to eat around. Not true! I lived in Africa for a while, and actually have been served at restaurants by Batwa pygmies. They did not have tattoo sleeves, wear gauges, or any facial piercings, (nor was the Amazon river delta anywhere in sight). In my experience they are warm, hospitable and polite, and completely undeserving of your drive-by slur.

Because servers are paid 1/3 minimum wage before tips, I never ding that much. I do want good service, but i'm not sure that it's fair to pay the server an effective $5.00/hour (or less) to make a point when we can't do that with anyone else. So, I do 20% (partially b/c is it easy to figure, as noted above--it's not that I can't figure 18% fairly easily, but why go through the trouble?). When do I diverge? As Robin noted, on tickets below $10 I'm sure I average somewhere between 35 and 50%. At very expensive restaurants, I will drop down to 18% because I figure they are being compensated better than most waits. If the service is bad, I'll go down to 15% or so.

But in almost every case, I usually round off the tip (up) just to make it simple, so that's in the server's favor.

In sum, I'm lazy.

I am with you guys on the "self mutilation" thing. There are better ways to express your right to do such nonsense. I just have to say WOW, and would look for another table.

Having a daughter with gauges and Tats. I find it a little small minded and awfully judgmental to use this as a criterion to wither you allow someone to wait on you or not. Let me see, its alright to listen to music performed by musicians with same, or buy the software designed by same, but you just can't stomach being assaulted by personal expression that is fast becoming a cultural norm? I could argue this point all day, but good luck with that small mindedness. Maybe we can ban "Obese Patrons" or women with dyed hair, or Bad Plastic Surgery. Yes, I know its a personal preference, but does it really reflect on that persons character, or intelligent, or cleanliness, or spirituality for that matter? It is a slippery slope, when you go down that road. And have you looked at Kitchen employees lately? Anyway, it just goes to show how small town we still are, to see comments like this in 2014. How about circumcision, should we find out if they have this personal mutilation done to them, before we proceed?

Having a daughter with gauges and Tats. I find it a little small minded and awfully judgmental to use this as a criterion to wither you allow someone to wait on you or not. Let me see, its alright to listen to music performed by musicians with same, or buy the software designed by same, but you just can't stomach being assaulted by personal expression that is fast becoming a cultural norm? I could argue this point all day, but good luck with that small mindedness. Maybe we can ban "Obese Patrons" or women with dyed hair, or Bad Plastic Surgery. Yes, I know its a personal preference, but does it really reflect on that persons character, or intelligent, or cleanliness, or spirituality for that matter? It is a slippery slope, when you go down that road. And have you looked at Kitchen employees lately? Anyway, it just goes to show how small town we still are, to see comments like this in 2014. How about circumcision, should we find out if they have this personal mutilation done to them, before we proceed?

Well said.

[Robin Garr]

drive-by slur.

That pretty much captures it all in a few words, Iggy.

Just as it is your daughter's right to do what she wants to her body, it is my right to decide that looking at someone with huge holes in their ears disgusts me, and it is my right to decide that I don't want to have to look at them during the course of dining out. As to listening to music performed by people with guages, I highly doubt that as I am stuck in the past musically, and I don't play games, use aps or even have an I Phone or Smart phone, so that pretty much rules that one out too. I would not employ someone with guages or facial piercings so as not to subject my customers to it. As I said, that is MY opinion and it is my business so I can do what the hell I like. On a side note, thankfully, it is impossible to tell if someone has been circumcised or not just by looking at them.

Having a daughter with gauges and Tats. I find it a little small minded and awfully judgmental to use this as a criterion to wither you allow someone to wait on you or not. Let me see, its alright to listen to music performed by musicians with same, or buy the software designed by same, but you just can't stomach being assaulted by personal expression that is fast becoming a cultural norm? I could argue this point all day, but good luck with that small mindedness. Maybe we can ban "Obese Patrons" or women with dyed hair, or Bad Plastic Surgery. Yes, I know its a personal preference, but does it really reflect on that persons character, or intelligent, or cleanliness, or spirituality for that matter? It is a slippery slope, when you go down that road. And have you looked at Kitchen employees lately? Anyway, it just goes to show how small town we still are, to see comments like this in 2014. How about circumcision, should we find out if they have this personal mutilation done to them, before we proceed?

Would any of you hire someone with tattoos on their face for a job interacting with the public? The answer is no. And that right there should tell you something about public perception. Freedom of expression is one thing but maintaining a professional appearance is another. You can have all the tattoos and piercings you want as long as you can cover/remove them when performing your duties. Someone like tattoo face however, I find unemployable. The same goes for overly gauged ears. It's mostly found weird and disgusting by a majority of people.

Kitchen employees are free to look like circus freaks and convicts.

As parents, my wife and I have tried to not make moral issues out of appearance. My son resembles the Geico caveman much of he time. There are much bigger issues for us to pay attention to (although I do reserve it as my God-given right as a parent to ridicule his choices .

But we do also try to communicate that although they can look like they want, they must also deal with the consequences of those decisions. Just because a person's hair, ears, or skin looks a certain way doesn't make that person a vagrant, a freak, or a thug. But they also cannot control the perceptions of other folks.

I kind of like going to a funky restaurant and finding that the server looks like they camped out at Tattoo Charlie's, but I'd find it less welcome at Corbett's. People make choices and must deal with the consequences of those choices.

Would any of you hire someone with tattoos on their face for a job interacting with the public? The answer is no. And that right there should tell you something about public perception. Freedom of expression is one thing but maintaining a professional appearance is another. You can have all the tattoos and piercings you want as long as you can cover/remove them when performing your duties. Someone like tattoo face however, I find unemployable. The same goes for overly gauged ears. It's mostly found weird and disgusting by a majority of people.

My wife, my two daughters and myself -all- work for companies that have -zero- tolerance for "visible" tattoos and "excessive" piercings...and in speaking with my daughters (who are actively climbing various "corporate ladders") this policy is becoming more and more common.

No, you can't tell if they are circumcised by looking at them, but you can tell if they are a "schmuck".

In terms of tipping, any server that starts with ANY phrase other than, "Hi my name is xxxxx and I will be your server today/tonight" automatically gets a Fiver on the spot. There are so many other introductions that are better.

Also a few years ago, the author of The Renegade Server, when I asked about a light physical contact with the patron, told me that when a server makes light contact, studies show a 20% increase in overall tips. Not to my personal liking, but if it works...