Ellen P wrote:Why wouldn't we want ribs with the meat falling off the bone? Why would I want something tough and chewy? And why would someone say we don't know what were talking about and they should be that way? That's fine. Serve tough and chewy ribs. We'll remember and not return. Really?
NO! There is a "happy medium" here, that I am afraid you are missing!
BBQ cooked "correctly" will have ribs exhibiting the ultimate of tenderness, yet the meat will not fall off the bone. Think of a wonderful beef stew . . . if done right, there are meltingly tender chunks of meat, while if over-cooked you end up with something resembling chili/shredded beef!
To truly get meat falling off the bone, one usually steams (or boils) the ribs first, then bakes them, and then finishes them on a grill. For "real" BBQ you cook the ribs (monitoring them throughout) for around 7 hours +/-, and may or may not finish them on a grill. It is extremely labor intensive, and requires skill to get them tender but not mushy, which is why many places advertise "fall off the bone", as it's too much trouble and takes too much time and skill to smoke them correctly!