server complains about tip

What would you do if a server crouched down near your seat and told you that the tip you left was not enough? That is what happened to a member of our dinner party at Jeff Ruby's last night.

It was understood that the server also asked (only after accusing diner of a small tip) if there was a problem with the service, and the diner responded no. Which was the truth, the diner just felt that 18-20% range was sufficient, hmmm, the server did not . The diner cut it off, but was extremely uncomfortable after that.

The other thing the server did was to completely ignore me for a drink order after a male diner that was sitting next to me ordered a bottle of wine . The male ordered the wine, the server closed his little order book, and took off to get the wine, cork it, pour it, and then was ready to take off again. I told him I would like to place a wine bottle order as well ,only mine would be a 1/2 bottle of red for my dinner. Being single and paying my own check I was left feeling a bit slighted, ignored, and found myself mumbling. jeez it's a mans world. hmm

All in all the food was well prepared, and delicious, and it was an overall wonderfully decadent and memorable evening with friends.

What is 15% of "Your'e Fired!"?

That is absolutely beyond inappropriate. 99% of the time I'll give a server the benefit of the doubt, but that is just not ok.

I would like to think that I would have responded by telling him that "Yes, there is a problem, obviously I've tipped too much for such rude service."

Yeah I am not clear where and when it became REQUIRED to tip. Servers perform a function and either they do it well or they do it poorly. There is no question that providing service to a boatload of people can be challenging but still keep it in the back of your mind that these people are leaving a "gratuity".

For me a server can remember my drinks, the specials, provided the food in a timely manner and I can even deal with no personality at all. But sometimes servers aren't in a good mood and aren't good at putting on a fake persona to make money. This is the very reason why I cannot be a server. That and my memory is terrible.

No question the job can be hard but remember the entire evening out is called a dining experience and that interaction with the server is a large part of it.

I definitely would have asked the server for the receipt back so I could correct the tip. I never would've rapidly cut the tip in half and announce "Problem solved". Also the manager should have been told about this rudeness.

So...I'm not excusing the server saying something. You just don't do that, period. If you do feel compelled to do it, you're probably well aware that you're putting your job at risk by doing so.

With that said, i find i HIGHLY unlikely the member of your party left a 20% tip and had a server say something. I've eaten at Ruby's several times (not a regular...way too expensive) and have friends that work there. The checks are high enough that you are making great money on 15-20% gratuity all night.

Even though its not right, i can sympathize from my time in the service industry what it feels like to have someone come in and spend hundreds of dollars of food and then leave you a couple of bucks. Its insulting. Believe me i WANTED to say something many times, i just couldn't risk my job.

So something just doesn't seem right about the situation. if your friend really left a satisfactory tip, they should definitely tell the manager about the situation. If they didn't, maybe they learned an embarrassing lesson.

With that said, i find i HIGHLY unlikely the member of your party left a 20% tip and had a server say something.

Let's see if I'm getting this right: Jason who joined four months ago and has made 39 posts is calling Heather who joined three years nine months ago and has made 1189 posts a liar. Think I'll put my money on Heather.

Skepticism on whether or not the person who says he/she tipped 18-20% actually did isn't the same thing as calling Heather a liar.

Regardless, it still sounds as though the server was unprofessional.

Skepticism on whether or not the person who says he/she tipped 18-20% actually did isn't the same thing as calling Heather a liar.

In this case how he worded it certainly came across that way. Besides other than his skepticism that was certainly nothing in Heather's original post that would lead anyone to think this. Face it, it certainly didn't add anything to the discussion other than discord. Especially since we all agree the server was out of place no matter what.

Skepticism on whether or not the person who says he/she tipped 18-20% actually did isn't the same thing as calling Heather a liar.

In this case how he worded it certainly came across that way. Besides other than his skepticism that was certainly nothing in Heather's original post that would lead anyone to think this. Face it, it certainly didn't add anything to the discussion other than discord. Especially since we all agree the server was out of place no matter what.

Let's all see how many more posts Jason G makes with the warm reception he is receiving.

He expressed doubt/skepticism. He didn't call anyone a liar. What is this, FoxNews? [that's a joke, Steve H!]

Actually i joined August 2008 and read the board almost daily. I rarely post unless i feel i have something to contribute.

Now, first, I didn't call anyone a liar. She said the server talked to a member of her party, which I took to mean wasn't her. My implication was that maybe the person actually tipped a certain amount, but said they tipped a different amount just to save face. If the author saw the actual tip, then i apologize. But i've never seen anyone share what they tipped at dinner.

I'm sorry if people feel I'm adding discord, but i disagree. I don't think the customer is always right, and thats from 6-7 years in the service industry. I think if you had bad service, the proper thing to do would be discuss the situation with management and certainly don't leave a good tip. Maybe 10% would be appropriate.

But if you had good service, have the money to eat at a place like Jeff Ruby's, and leave a shoddy tip, you are not right in my opinion. In this case it may have been a misunderstanding, it may have been a very rude server, it could have been anything. But there are many people who just refuse to tip their servers and IF this was one of those situations, i sympathize with the server.

Jason, I personally don't care when you came to this board, but when you come on and refute what I said then there is a problem.

I said that the fellow diner tipped 18%, and that is service standard. If the server didn't like it, that was just tough sh... We were all commenting that this young man was given too many tables for service that evening, as he was struggling to keep up. We were a table of six, the table next to us was a table of eight, then two tables of two diners each, and he had help from two back ups that I personally spoke to throughout the course of the evening. If this kid was having a bad night, and felt he was being stiffed he needs to find another line of work with a monetary guarantee.

The diner informed the server of being out of line, and felt that was a sufficient handling of a sticky situation. The only person who learned an embarassing lesson here is the server who forgot the manners that I am sure his momma taught him.

I don't think he refuted anything. I think he was questioning whether you personally saw the tip in question. Something you still haven't answered...

But as everyone else has already said... regardless of circumstance, the server was out of line and should be shitcanned. There are some lines you don't cross.

[Robin Garr]

But as everyone else has already said... regardless of circumstance, the server was out of line and should be shitcanned. There are some lines you don't cross.

Well said.