Dress Codes -- What Do You Think

Well, if you want to see our pics online, you'll see that we looked nice at dinner without wearing sport jackets/ties/heels. Maybe if we wanted to go that route, fine, but we traveled with one carryon and hopped on trains and buses, no car. I will say that my fit husband in khakis and wrinkle free Exofficio shirt looked better than some 400 pounder in a crumpled jacket and tie.

http://llindac.myphotoalbum.com/slidesh ... me=album02

Well, if you want to see our pics online, you'll see that we looked nice at dinner without wearing sport jackets/ties/heels. Maybe if we wanted to go that route, fine, but we traveled with one carryon and hopped on trains and buses, no car. I will say that my fit husband in khakis and wrinkle free Exofficio shirt looked better than some 400 pounder in a crumpled jacket and tie.

http://llindac.myphotoalbum.com/slidesh ... me=album02

I checked my post, and as I thought, I never said nor implied that you didn't look nice. Nor did I state or imply that your husband was less attractive than 400 pound men.

I said that on my trip to France (also no car, just trains, buses, and subways) it was not a hardship to take a blazer and a pair of pants for nice restaurants.

When you apply the mundane to everything, nothing is special anymore.
A graduation, a marriage proposal, a 25th wedding anniversary, a 50th birthday, a big job promotion,... sometimes you want to have a "special" dining experience, to dress-up and go to someplace "Nice". A time worth remembering.
Just as I enjoy the broad spectrum of different cuisines, I also enjoy the fun of going casual to Mike Lennigs as well as getting spruced-up for a special occasion at the Oak Room.
IMHO- People who don't care about what they wear when dining out are like the poor, shallow souls who only dine out at McDonald's.

I think that it is only the shallow that worry about what other people think about them. People should stop worrying about other people. Does someone wearing shorts in a restaurant really stop you from enjoying yourself?

I think that it is only the shallow that worry about what other people think about them. People should stop worrying about other people. Does someone wearing shorts in a restaurant really stop you from enjoying yourself?

I don't make it a habit to dress up for dinner often. But there is appropriate wear for appropriate places. I wouldn't wear shorts and sandles to the Oakroom, period. And yes, it does affect the overall ambiance of a place.

I think that it is only the shallow that worry about what other people think about them. People should stop worrying about other people. Does someone wearing shorts in a restaurant really stop you from enjoying yourself?

No, someone wearing shorts in a restaurant does not automatically stop me from enjoying the occasion.
It's one thing to "worry about what other people think of them", it's another to be considerate of others and the context of the surroundings . I wouldn't wear a "Megadeath" tank-top and cut offs to my grandmother's funeral nor would I cheapen the ambiance of a five star restaurant in the same outfit.

I would personally dress for the appropriate occasion but not once have I ever been in a restaurant like Jeff Ruby's and looked around at other people and gotten upset that they weren't wearing the "appropriate" atire. The ambience of a restaurant cannot be ruined by a pair of shorts in my opinion.

When you apply the mundane to everything, nothing is special anymore.

Well put.

I would personally dress for the appropriate occasion but not once have I ever been in a restaurant like Jeff Ruby's and looked around at other people and gotten upset that they weren't wearing the "appropriate" atire. The ambience of a restaurant cannot be ruined by a pair of shorts in my opinion.

Who said anyone was "upset?" I am sure that a pair of shorts could never affect the ambience of a room; nonetheless, it does affect the ambiance of a high-end restaurant for me. It's not fatal--I just don't like it--just like a don't like too-loud muzak in a restaurant. It doesn't affect it for you--fine. I don't like it.

Generally I would rather go to a restaurant wear shorts are appropriate--but not for my 20th wedding anniversary, for instance.

You'd be amazed what I see people wear to court.

Ha ha....good point, Ron. I wanted to clarify about the "jacket and tie" statement. A guy wearing a jacket he bought 25 years and 50 pounds ago with a striped shirt and a bright paisley tie fit the dress code for the particular room I mentioned. But my husband in a nice long sleeved white shirt and khakis did not. Heck, we could have gone to the Salvation army and picked up a sportcoat and tie and gotten in, lol. So the rule can be quite ridiculous, really. I have less trouble with a "no t-shirts or sneakers " rule. But even the sneaker thing might be challenged.

That just seems a little funny to impose a rule like that in a very touristy spot where many people schlepping luggage all over Europe don't have space and weight allowance to bring a coat, tie and don't forget dress shoes. And most small Inns and B&Bs in Europe don't provide irons. Ours didn't.

A guy wearing a jacket he bought 25 years and 50 pounds ago with a striped shirt and a bright paisley tie fit the dress code for the particular room I mentioned.

Just imagine what he'd be wearing if there was no dress code!

That just seems a little funny to impose a rule like that in a very touristy spot where many people schlepping luggage all over Europe don't have space and weight allowance to bring a coat, tie and don't forget dress shoes. And most small Inns and B&Bs in Europe don't provide irons. Ours didn't.

Guess I agree with Ron. I travel internationally quite a bit and only rarely take more than a hanging bag, which easily accommodates an extra pair of shoes and a blue sports coat. The ironingt thing can be an issue in Europe, of course, where they don't trust us with an iron in our room!

Overall, I agree with all the comments about the ambience being effected by a slovenly dressed crew at a higher-end place (guess that applies well beyond restaurants, to me). And I also agree that "special" places are made more special by people who are dressed like they think it may be special, too.

[Robin Garr]

Guess I agree with Ron. I travel internationally quite a bit and only rarely take more than a hanging bag, which easily accommodates an extra pair of shoes and a blue sports coat. The ironingt thing can be an issue in Europe, of course, where they don't trust us with an iron in our room!

I may have a warped view also, because like TP, I travel to Europe fairly often, moreover on food and wine business that calls for a fair amount of business meetings and fine dining (such a hard job I have!) Like it or not, the reality is that Europeans in general are very conservative about "appropriate" dress - conservative about suit or discreet jacket and tie, at least, although a lot of their styles are nicely avant garde. I generally check through one fair-size suitcase with enough dress-up attire to see me through, and I've never regretted it. Ironing, I don't worry about too much, either because I can get away with the rumpled look even though I'm still a frog hair under 400 pounds ... I generally find that wool jackets and slacks hang out nicely if you put them in the bathroom and turn on a hot shower for a while ... and at worst, there's always the valet.

For the kind of travel I used to do, though, and the kind that Linda and her husband do, I can see her point. Carrying a jacket, nice shirt and tie (or the female equivalent) can be a real pain if you're hiking or just enjoying casual travel. Bottom line, both points of view make sense, but it's a harsh reality that Americans showing up "under-dressed" at more upscale European establishments simply comes across as a bit insulting to them and might tend to reinforce "ugly American" stereotypes even when nothing could have been farther from our minds.

From a back of the house professional's point of view(and this might sound weird to most of you who know me),When I take the time to put on a clean jacket and apron to go into the dining room to visit the patrons, I do find it a little dishearting to see someone not dressed "appropriately" after I've spent the time and effort to prepare their food and present it with all of the upmost care that I can.

I mean really... If you can afford to eat out at one of our fair cities "Finer" establishments(Equus, Le Relais, The Oakroom, Jack Fry's, to name a few)then how hard is it to put on a shirt with a collar and some khakis. I'm not expecting every male to don a jacket and tie, but a little decorum would be nice. In no way would I ever turn down the opportunity to feed someone, but a little discretion would be nice before you come plodding into a nice restaurant with sandals, cut-off shorts and a grubby T-shirt.

When I get the chance to dine out, I'm very aware of what I'm wearing, and if it is appropriate for where I'm going. Call me a prude or old-fashioned but I feel that for certain occasions, every one should rise to them.