LEO/LHB Industry Standard: Fed and not heard?

Our son is 15 and has been to fine dining restaurants all over the world since he was a baby. In all those years we only had a problem on one occasion very early - and I guess I broke the rules because I left an extra $50 on top of the tip. This was at the Bristol on Hurstbourne.

So basically my son was raised dining out and that has served him and us very well. He has an appreciation, at a very early age, for fine food, he understands an appropriate gratuity, and he doesn't eat crap. Plus we've been able to include him and pass along our passion for food. He's interested in food as a career actually and reads the forum from time to time.

Since he's an only child this has been relatively easy for us but I think the key is to start early.

Everybody must maintain a certain level of understanding that not everyone in our community is a perfect diner. If you want perfection, stay at home and master the art of perfection.

When you go out, you get an experience. Part of it is the food, part of it is interacting with your community. Some interactions and experiences will be better than others.

In short, Chill..........

With all due respect, I believe there is acceptable behavior for adults and children in public and non acceptable behavior. Interaction with the community does not give parents who cater to the ever whim of their children the right to subject everyone to tantrums, running around the restaurant tripping servers and customers, throwing objects, and engaging in all the rude behavior that got most of us "old school" people firmly disciplined as children.

If I misbehaved in public, I was escorted out to the car. End of trip. For most kids, the end of the trip is enough punishment to get them to wise up and behave, but since more and more parents are just sitting back helplessly, their kids aren't learning this lesson.

Not all child behavior is disruptive and rude. I find it cute when they sit quietly and watch everyone around them, and it's not a crime for them to speak in a louder tone than adults do.

They all have to learn the rules of society otherwise when they grow up, they'll bring their bad habits to educational institutions and the workplace. If they can't behave dining out, they won't behave in school and they won't perform well in the workplace.

If you want perfection, stay at home and master the art of perfection.

No one is asking for perfection; just use decorum.

I've been blessed with pretty much brilliantly well-behaved kids (four of them) and we've taken them to some pretty swank places. Thankfully, they have been "up to it" from the beginning. What I hate is other diners who pulll that "my world has just come to an end" face as soon as they spy anyone under five feet tall. If my kids are acting up in some way, then I can assume we may be the subject of disapproving looks. Until something untoward happens, other diners giving us the leer are the ones guilty of being rude. And no, I really don't care what terrible experiences they've had in the past.

This reminds me of one of my favorite scenes in "Family Guy" where Brian & Stewy are sitting at a restaurant & Brian starts yelling at a crying baby. I know exactly how he feels. However, I must say that a teenager in the cinema is much worse than a baby in a restaurant.

From the other side, we have relatives in town whose children are so bad that I won't dine with them in public. I had lunch with the mother at Zen Garden, and her eldest child sat on the table, talked loudly, and then proceeded to walk around the dining room. Mom didn't seem to notice. It was when she began to walk to other tables and try to crawl in the laps of other diners that I brought her back and told her to sit down. Mom's reaction: "if it bothered them, they would have said something."

I tried again at another place, and she plunked the kids on the floor between the tables (and the table behind us was occupied) and handed them food. Her reasoning: "kids won't sit in chairs." Of course, mine were sitting in theirs when she said it.

so, I'm not saying there are no bad parents. I do think they are in the minority.

I think I told this story on another thread but it's kinda cute (?) in an embarrassing kinda way, so I'll tell it again.

I've got this bunch of "kin folk" over in eastern TN and the hillbilly meter is pretty much pegged...So one day everyone goes to (I can't recall, think it was) "Old Country Buffet" and the family is seated on the opposite end of the restaurant from the serving stations. During the meal, one of my little "cuzins"...(an 8 y.o. "spittin' image" of his "Deddy"...right down to the three teeth)...stands up on his chair and YELLS all the way across the restaurant: "HEY MOMMA, BRANG ME SUM MORE A THEM TATERS".

I know it's supposed to be rude. But, I find that damn funny.

That's completely kosher in East TN.

SteveO'Pete! I got curly brained kinfolk from the kuntry too, and some of them think those misbehaved kiddlins are a door bell - DING DONG! ("A door bell"="adorable")

Anyway, I'll never forget 25 years ago when my dad told my sibs and I (after running the aisles and dumping shakers) at 5th Quarter "We will NEVER go out to dinner again". He wasn't kidding, mostly - we finally got to go to Chi Chi's for birthdays in our late teen yrs.

Also, I do feel sad for parents of kids with "feeding disorders" - I just read something about children's therapy groups to learn to like more than 20 foods.

PS. TOTALLY off topic (Not affiliated, just enthusiastic), but I'm eating the most delicious wheat crusted super veggie add bacon calzone delivered by Za's right now and ALMOST don't know what to do with myself. Ohmylord.