A Facebook Servers Rant....Justified?

Before starting my shop, I served for over ten years. I do believe 20% has become the base, and 15% is on the low end. With that being said, if you get terrible service I can understand not leaving the same amount as if your service was satisfactory. This might make me look like an ass but I am going to be honest. Stereotypes exist for a reason. I am not talking race either, but mostly by profession (I will explain later), every server believes they are great, the same way everybody thinks they are an excellent driver (just not true). I was knowledgeable about the menu I was serving, always made sure drinks were full and dishes were pre-bussed. I consistently received comments about the great service was that I provided, but when I did happen to get a negative comment. (Not often but over the years I can remember a handful and it was always a call or from the manager never to my face) it was about how I was not overly friendly. I looked sad or some other b.s When I go out to eat, I do not care if the person bends over to kiss my A** as long as they are proficient in their job knowledgeable and are not rude to me everything else is a perk. Getting back to the stereotype thing. I noticed over the years the lunch crowd tippers were always the lowest. It might have been due to the fact that they ate out every day and it was easier on the wallet to skimp on the tip. I would say overall the worse tippers to me (just personal experience) were women who worked in offices. They were always friendly but for some reason just were stingy with the tippage. I understood service. I realized these people were paying my bills, It was my job to make them happy, and it made me happy to do so , I met some incredible people serving and sometimes felt like I knew these people and we were friends by the time they left the table. I miss it sometimes, but there were also times you get the insatiables. The type of customers even people dining with them want to bury their heads in the sand. I understand people expect to be treated fairly and respected when they go out to spend their hard earned money on a meal, but do not come out to eat with entitlement that you want the server to make up for the boyfriend who doesn’t tell you are pretty enough or the dad that didn't hug you enough as a child. Some people are just cheap. They do not want to admit it so they will look for any reason to skimp on the tip. This happens. Some people seem to forget most servers do not receive any benefits (unless working for a chain) they do not have insurance, paid vacations or retirement. It is not a glamorous job. It is hard work both mentally and physically. Whenever I did receive a bad tip, I would try to reflect on what the problem was. Sometimes you know (forgot to bring this or that) but sometimes I wish the person would have came to me to if they had an issue for me to try to make it right for them. Lastly, I feel we need to be respectful and courteous diners as well.

1. Do not go into a sit down restaurant 5 minutes before close (it’s just rude)
2. Do not order everything on the menu knowing your are on a budget and just leave a crappy tip because it is all you have left.
3. If you know you are going to want a side of this and a side of that, tell the server so she can accommodate everything at once and not 20 different trips
4. Do not hold the server accountable for the mistakes of the hostess (table times) or the kitchen staff (over/under cooked food or ticket times)
I do not agree with and would never post such a comment especially on a public forum as this person did.

Good servers are great actors! Your wish is there command. The customer is always right. The facebook poster needs to learn to just grin and bear it with a yes maam or yes sir and friendly nod while mentally cursing his mother in his head like all the other servers.


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Added to my post above: I'd say that 20% has become the floor, not the median for good work. Maybe not for the Cheddar's/Olive Garden set .

Why should we short change the Cheddars/Olive Garden set?....

I think Robin's point was that the people who usually go to those type restaurants don't normally tip as well as many of the people who go to the local independents do. It had nothing to do with the people who work there.

Some people seem to forget most servers do not receive any benefits (unless working for a chain) they do not have insurance, paid vacations or retirement. It is not a glamorous job. It is hard work both mentally and physically. Whenever I did receive a bad tip, I would try to reflect on what the problem was. Sometimes you know (forgot to bring this or that) but sometimes I wish the person would have came to me to if they had an issue for me to try to make it right for them. Lastly, I feel we need to be respectful and courteous diners as well.
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This is a very thoughtful post and think it does a great job of shedding light on a job that we all come in contact with on a regular basis but don't fully appreciate/value. My mom was a waitress for many years and I've always had a soft spot for servers. I'm always friendly with my server and I too feel that I must hold up my end of the diner/server relationship. I tip 20% as a rule and more if its a small check or I'm really impressed with the service provided.

Reading Jamie's post, I was reminded of seeing my mom come home often exhausted from her waitress job. Some server is likely to get a great tip from me at my next opportunity for even adequate service.

I am proud to say that I have spent the better part of my life in different capacities in the restaurant business from dishwasher to GM and owner. When I moved to Louisville I made the conscious decision to be a server so that I could set about doing the other things I wanted in my life. I am very lucky to have had wonderful employers since getting to Louisville- and for the most part great guests. I really wouldn't change a thing in my life at the moment.

I must admit though that I am sick and tired of the triannual discussion of tipping/not tipping, it's only a buffet, I didn't get what I ordered, I don't want a server with tatoos......

It's not that the tipping discussion isn't important, but I can't imagine that with all this virtual ink used on this theme anyone's mind has been changed. I really believe that a 15% tipper will always be a 15% tipper and the same goes for a 10%er or a 25%er. I tell my younger colleagues who go off like the OP when they get a unexplained bad tip that life is way to short to put that much energy into hating. Soon enough a 25 or 30% will come along and it will all even out.

Does any other job elicit as much talk about what the employee is worth other than those in the upper 1%? I don't think so. I think it's because it's one of the only jobs where pay is decided on a personal basis. I wish it weren't that way, but I can't see it changing in the forseeable future.

Steve, I think you are probably off the hook. I am a proud member of three unions but can see no way for the industry here to be unionized.

Jaime you are absolutely correct about very few employees in the industry getting benefits. (Inserting boldfaced plug) I would urge anyone interested to checkout the APRON, Inc. thread and the Facebook page. We are a new organization that hopes to alliviate a bit of the financial burden during very difficult times for independant industry workers.

So what is the issue exactly? That the tipping expectation has become 20% or that a server would rant about the unfairness of 15%? I have a comment on both.

First of all, the server shouldn't be ranting over social media about the very people that pay their bills. Aside from the fact that employers are legally allowed to take action against you for drawing negative attention to their business, it's just tacky. Complain to your friends after work over a couple of beers. Tell your spouse. Call your mom. Everyone has bad nights and it is your God given right to bitch all you want. Just be careful how you do it.

As to the question of tip percentage, there is another aspect that doesn't usually come up. And that relates to the system in which the server tips out the rest of the staff (bussers, bartenders, etc). Each restaurant has their own system but some of the most drastic involve tipping out based on a percentage of sales. Some higher end restaurants use a system where the server will tip out a certain percentage of their sales, REGARDLESS of the percentage of tip received. That means, if the percentage were say... 5%, a server could only expect to take home $75 on every $100 made (assuming the server was tipped 20% across the board). If the server makes 15% all night, the tip out still remains the same and the server would only walk with $50.

I saw a horrible example of this the other night. A server had two tables of foreign decent. She received tips of $50 on $600 and $40 on $700. With her sales being $1300, she was required to tip out $65. You getting the picture? She walked with $25 on what should have been a $200 night. It cost her $45 to work after paying her babysitter. I only include the foreign decent thing as a clarification in that there are many cultures who do not understand our tipping system, and that the server did nothing wrong to warrant such abysmal tips.

So yeah.... 5% can be a big deal to some people. Add that to the fact that January and February are two of the slowest months of the year for restaurants and you've got some stressed out servers out there. When it comes down to rent time and the restaurant's not busy, and the people who do come in aren't spending much and tipping badly.... people can start to freak out.

That's still no excuse for throwing a tantrum on facebook and making us all look bad.

[Robin Garr]

Added to my post above: I'd say that 20% has become the floor, not the median for good work. Maybe not for the Cheddar's/Olive Garden set .

Why should we short change the Cheddars/Olive Garden set? They work every bit as hard as the fine dining and the checks are usually smaller so the tips are usually smaller. For good service I tend to tip a little higher percentage in the despicable chains. I wasn't aware they were second class citizens.

I'm talking about CUSTOMERS who won't pay decent tips. The C/OG servers are the ones who suffer.

Well, my take home pay has halved since 2008. Given that, I'm not inclined to be sympathetic to someone ranting over a 15% tip.

WOW! And, I think I go off on rants sometimes.

Robin is probably right. Economy is tight so customer cuts back the tip from 18-20 to 15 percent. That's roughly $2.50 on a $50 bill. Four tables over the course of an hour, and she is down $10.00 an hour.

And worked just as hard, just as long for the lesser pay.

I am not judging, her or customers. That may have been posted after a long night of being down tipped, because she was a bit off kilter, which could have been because her child is sick and she's had no rest but had to come in and work.

And then when the restaurant you work at as a written policy of adding on a ..... wait for it....

10% gratuity for parties of 6 or more...

Talk about setting the stage for failure. Lets customers know that 10% tip is the right amount.

Don't get me started on having minimum tips for large parties. I'll give you a rant that makes your screen melt.

So, it may be that our girl here, needs to move on to another fine establishment where management understands the need for good tips and doesn't downgrade their service staff like that.

Just Saying

Richard

And then when the restaurant you work at as a written policy of adding on a ..... wait for it....

10% gratuity for parties of 6 or more...

I've seen 18-20% gratuity added for large parties, but never 10%. What restaurant would be dumb enough to do that?

And then when the restaurant you work at as a written policy of adding on a ..... wait for it....

10% gratuity for parties of 6 or more...

I've seen 18-20% gratuity added for large parties, but never 10%. What restaurant would be dumb enough to do that?

I don't think it would be fair to the thread starter to name the place. It is NOT a cheap seat.

Richard

Can someone, perhaps the original poster, explain why this thread was started in the first place? It's a topic that's been beaten to death around here, and I'm not seeing any new insights or thoughts (no offense, everyone). And I'm guessing that the original sentiment, on another social media outlet, wasn't meant for the HotBytes audience. So, again, why bother posting it? It doesn't seem the "friendly" thing to do, strangely enough.

Can someone, perhaps the original poster, explain why this thread was started in the first place?

Well Joel, since the OP has so far chosen not to respond to your question and you posed your question to “someone,” I'll take a stab at it.

The OP suggested we discuss it. Guess what? Twenty-five people including yourself chose to do just that and so far there have been 755 views on this post. If you're reading this - that's 756. Perhaps you'll even choose to post - again. That's what the forum is for.

It's a topic that's been beaten to death around here, and I'm not seeing any new insights or thoughts (no offense, everyone).

Well Joel (no offense) but I'm pretty sure this forum isn't being run solely for your benefit. I've seen some very good back and forth here. Maybe you've already seen all this before. I'm guessing the people who have chosen to reply, found the subject worth their time. You spent some time whining about the post instead of ignoring it. Oh yeah (no offense)

And I'm guessing that the original sentiment, on another social media outlet, wasn't meant for the HotBytes audience.

So you're just guessing here, you don't really know? Maybe you should just decide from now on what is meant for the HotBytes audience so the rest of us don't waste our time? I see all kinds of stuff on here that I struggle to find relevant but I resist the urge to condemn it. If I'm not interested, I just don't look at it. I don't insult the OP. Oh btw way, qualifying your remarks with “no offense” doesn't really work most of the time. Do you think?

So, again, why bother posting it? It doesn't seem the "friendly" thing to do, strangely enough.

Friendly huh. So you think the post was unfriendly and naturally did the friendly thing and called it all a waste of time!

You know what? I think the only post on this thread that's a waste of time and unfriendly is yours. Oh yeah and probably this one. Discuss

I had received this from a facebook friend and the many supportive responses from fellow waiters that responded, and was just interested in hearing from you folks. The rage in the rant is not a joke, this is a persons livelihood, and also addresses the other side of waiting, that a great deal of work is done before and after that magic service period. I moved to the 20% stance years ago, and it really has to be bad, unfriendly service for me to move from that number. There are so many variables in service, kitchen, crowd, etc... that often the wait staff is not at fault. Though we are in a much different situation, we pay a decent hourly wage plus tips, that averages out to a livable wage. Still, no insurance, no benefits, but with the low profit margin of most restaurants being so razor thin, I don't see a solution. We as a country have demanded low prices for so long on so so many thing, Sugar, Coffee, Oil...on and on, that to charge enough to treat all employees fairly, price would have to double. So I guess my point in posting this was, Tip 20% at least, no matter where you are or how the food tasted. These people are barely getting by. Have a heart. It is bone aching work that demands speed, multi-tasking, and a ability to deal with all shades of craziness from customers. It is a battle that has to be won every night without fail. There is no grace period, not putting off the task until tomorrow. The war has to be fought and won at all costs. Thanks for all the responses.

If a server averages $125/hr in sales, 15% of that is is $18.75 plus the $2.11 is $20.86 per hour. That's not bad money. The downside is they aren't going to have 8 busy hours at most places, probably more like 3 to 4hrs or so of peak time.

I can tell you one thing based on experience, if a good server received 15% on every ticket they would be happy. Unfortunately, that is not usually the case.

I have learned so much as a member of this forum. I have no friends or family that are servers or have been servers, in fact in my much younger days I admit I was very demanding of servers and my friend even said "waitress bashing"was one of my hobbies. I am truly ashamed of this now. If anything I tend to try not to complain unless absolutely no other choice. My base tip has also gone to 20 percent and I usually tip more.