What's yours?

Two stand-outs:

First, not a rookie mistake, an early morning, careless mistake two years ago, gashed my knuckle and severed a tendon on a #10 can lid in the garbage can. Lid was in there under something, I went to throw away a flour bag, and pressed down when I put it in...SLICE, right through the knuckle. 12 stitches.

Second, very rookie mistake in the early days, we had a flat top griddle with a pull out grill underneath. One day the grill would not light for anything (older equipment common problem). So I set a piece of cardboard on fire and slid it back on the grill to (hopefully) light the burners. It didn't light right off, so like an idiot, I bend down and look inside to find out why...Yep. Whooooosh. It lit alright and the gas build-up sent flames shooting out the grill directly into my face. Luckily, I only came away with first degree burns over my entire face, absolutely no facial hair of any kind and an early receeding hairline. I think it scared me more than anything. I never, ever looked in there or anywhere else like there again.

-We have a legend at Baxter about a line cook who impaled his hand on the ticket spike. I wasn't there for that one but the story makes its rounds to all the new cooks.

I had always feared this would happen to someone like me...

- I've FALLEN in the kitchen more times than I'd like to admit. Bruised tailbones hurt.

Not a serious one but very entertaining, one 4th of July we were having a cookout at my best friends families house in Corydon, and it started to pour, but being invincible and stupid, we decided to get that grill lit anyway. We must have sprayed a quarter bottle of kerosene into the grill with the lid mostly shut (to protect the coals from the rain), then I threw in a match. The kerosene flair up shot right out of the side of the grill and covered most of my right side for a split second. Took off all the hair on my arm, bit of beard, and gave me a not so serious sunburn over all the skin that wasn't covered in clothing.

The other one, was my first year at Winston's I was demoing the complete menu to a batch of new students, and set a pan with clarified butter on a burner to heat up. Started explaining the next dish, and answering questions, and by the time I was done talking, I had a pan of burnt butter. No problem, grab a new pan, add butter, use new pan to nudge old pan aside. Only I smacked it and flipped it, burnt butter and all over my right hand. Got one finger very badly, and the back of my hand very badly. And of course, once again being invincible, I continued to demo my dishes, and didn't bother to put on ice or anything, and just gritted my teeth through the pain. To add insult to injury, those who know me, know I have COOK tattooed on the fingers of my right hand. The finger that got badly burned, was that second O, and just perfectly to remove the right side of the O, making it look like a C unless you looked closely. Wore a bandaid on that much longer than I had too, until the burn was healed enough to get my C changed back to an O.

While going to culinary school in Virginia I had a friend(Brian) from New York City who hardly ever spent time in cars, I used this to scare him to death daily. I will never forget this one day while running late for our lab class, and rushing to get our knife kits from my trunk, Brian's kit flew open and all his knives fell out, like a good friend I start to help Brian to put the knives back in while during the rush stabbed him in the hand with a 12" French knife, with a huge gash that almost went all the way through, Brian left to get stitches, and missed lecture, but made it back for the lab portion of the class and after only being there for about ten minutes, I managed to sling hot roux all over the Brian's arm and hand...the same hand, he had to leave class again for medical attention.I don't hear from Brian much these days.

Holy cr*p you pros have gone through battle! These are some hair raising tales that should be published and handed out to all new restaurant employees and made mandatory, cautionary, reading.

My only cooking scar, other than the usual dozen burns up and down my arms from baking , is on my index finger just below the nail. I was prying some coconut meat off a shell piece with a fork. It slipped and the dull fork tine went all the way through my finger grazing the bone. It hurt more trying to pull it out than it did going in.

As a young pizza cook I slipped putting one into the oven and seared my forearm nicely.

My personal worst was 10 gallons of boiling water dumped down my backside. Laid flat on my stomach for 2 weeks and missed more than a month of work.

-We have a legend at Baxter about a line cook who impaled his hand on the ticket spike. I wasn't there for that one but the story makes its rounds to all the new cooks.

That was me Mark..happened at a Houlihans though (just pulled it out and kept going...surprizingly, it just sealed back up)

surprizingly, it just sealed back up)

When working in a collefe cafeteria during my undergrad years, I was slicing a big batch of pizza dough into smaller personal pan-sized amounts and found a way to slice the tip of my thumb almost straight off. The blood loss was amazing, and, due to insurance claim policy, I had to visit the campus health clinic (on the clock, nicely).

Having applied pressure to the injury for a significant amount of time, the injury had completely sealed up by the time I was seen by a doctor. In fact, the doctor was somewhat unconvinced I had even been injured in the first place. The super-bloody apron I was still wearing proved to be the evidence I needed.

To add insult to injury, those who know me, know I have COOK tattooed on the fingers of my right hand. The finger that got badly burned, was that second O, and just perfectly to remove the right side of the O, making it look like a C unless you looked closely. Wore a bandaid on that much longer than I had too, until the burn was healed enough to get my C changed back to an O.

Aaron -
That's pretty hilarious.
You could've maybe made some new friends had you not covered it up...


The worst I've done was slicing almost my entire fingernail off of my index finger.
No flesh, just the nail...
I was working at the (original) Asiatique, and had only been there a few weeks...
I remember looking up at the other cook prepping across the table from me, and he says to me "i think you need a band-aid". Almost passed out because I was bleeding so much and I'm squeamish with (seeing that much of my own) blood as well.

To make matters worse; it's not like a cut or burn that heals in a week or more.
It took well over a month for my nail to fully grow back... had to have it mummified constantly.
Couldn't touch anything without screaming in pain, much less getting any kind of soap/chemical on it.

The second worst: tip of the thumb slicing ham (you know, the very last itty-bitty piece.) Took forever to heal.

The worst (and most humorous:)

Tony Roma's ('96-'99:) I used to do a Saturday morning family meal for the crew. Brunch stuff, hangover cures, only family meal we did. Get the point? One particular morning I was trying out this new recipe I had run across: 'the frittata.' Hehe. 14 years ago, lol!

So, I do it all and pop it into the 375d oven, get back to skinning ribs and then the light goes on in my mind...

"Sh!t. I hope ain't burned. I hope it ain't burned.'

I run, like a jackalope. Open the oven and pull out the frittata pan, a deep sautee, with handle.

Did I mention with no oven mitt?

Oh, so I get this monstrosity of 2 dozen eggs, bacon, cheese, chives and lord-knows-whatelse halfway to the counter before my mind says:

'Drop this, now.'

Oh no, this is breakfast. I actually held the pan feigning and dodging, around pans of ribs to find the only spot available on the counter.

2nd and 3rd degree burns on the palm of my strong hand. It wasn't the wound, but the ensuing shifts that were agony. I was a cook trying to prove himself- there ain't no punking out on that commitment.

Even worse- I was running fry station at a Tony Roma's, on International Drive in Orlando. Four fry wells to one side, a salamander to the next. I actually kept my hand in an ice bath throughout the next week's service, alternating when I could...

I almost forgot...


EVERY cook will get themselves on a mandoline or benriner at least once (maybe just a knick, but at least once!) in their careers.

It's just a matter of time...


(i've seen some bad ones...)

I almost forgot...


EVERY cook will get themselves on a mandoline or benriner at least once (maybe just a knick, but at least once!) in their careers.

It's just a matter of time...


(i've seen some bad ones...)

Hehe. Tomatoes?

I almost forgot...


EVERY cook will get themselves on a mandoline or benriner at least once (maybe just a knick, but at least once!) in their careers.

It's just a matter of time...


(i've seen some bad ones...)

Hehe. Tomatoes?

Tomatoes? hell, on anything!

I want to add one more.

I never went to culinary school, but I did come up through the kitchen. One of the things they teach you in school (that I had to learn the hard way) is to curl your fingers inward whenever you're slicing meat.

Well, one day I was slicing some skirt steak for a fajita with my fingers extended and sliced off the corner of my index finger at almost a 45 degree angle (enough to cut off the corner of the nail on shortly clipped nails).

Anyone who has cooked for any period of time has probably had a similar injury, if only through rushing the task at hand. But here is my question...

Doesn't it make the most disgusting crunching noise when you do it? The noise is your first clue that you just fu*#ed up. Then you have to pause before you look at your finger to verify you are seriously hurt. It takes a few seconds for the pains to set it.

It happened almost 10 years ago but my finger still has a slightly weird angle at the end, Thinking back on it... it's the thought of that crunch that still makes me cringe.

Hehe...

Gary- You don't hear the sound as much as you feel the sound, don't you? Even before the pain comes, you know you just got got. And that it's gonna take time to patch the thing up- time you don't have. I always respond the same way: 'Son of a...' I don't even bother finishing the phrase- I need to be pulling apart the band-aid wrapper!

Ethan- Carrots, on the bias, are even worse. You're running along smooth. Schwack, schwack, schwack. Until you hit the one with the fibrous heart. KA-Swwaaaccckkk!



EDIT: That gives me a killer idea. Some sounds are actually felt. I have been working on some cool sonic applications for Hum Liqueur (Adam Seger's spirit- he's a Louisville Aluminus Emeritus.) I'm gonna have to mull this one over, for sure.

Think the pager they give you at the corporate joints to let you know your table is ready. Some of them are made to be coasters.