do servers not listen anymore?

Jessica, I have to echo what Shawn said...in the kitchen, we joke about folks that say they're allergic to butter or water. There definitely is such a thing as a parsley allergy, but it's pretty rare. We'd always err on the side of caution, but folks that seem to be faking allergies ("I'm allergic to salt") just earn our disdain in the back. Regardless - everywhere I've worked - we honor the request anyway.

We'd far rather hear that you said "I'm sorry to be any trouble, but I REALLY hate herb garnishes on my food. It would be great if you could find a way to keep that stuff off my plate - I'd so appreciate it." Actually, we probably wouldn't even hear about that - it's not a good enough kitchen-telling story, just a reasonable request.

[

Been there, done that. I've disliked garnishes for as long as I've been able to order my own food. In most cases, after I've stressed my request before the server walks away, it comes out with garnish. I get it though--I've worked in the industry long enough to know how it works. I realize that in most restaurants one of the jobs of the expeditor is to put that final garnish on top. Meanwhile, they are trying to make sure that all the orders are up and that the server knows where steak is which, etc. If the only way to get it through to the server or chef is to say that it's an allergy, I don't see a problem with that. It saves us both the hassle of having to send it back and me having to wait. At chain restaurants (which I have absolutely no problem eating at), they usually just stir it in anyway hoping that I don't notice. I usually don't even request no garnish at local indie restaurants because they typically garnish with something a little more unique. However, I do not mind if the kitchen and severs laugh about it because anyone that I care about in the industry knows I'm weird like that. Bad karma? Maybe. Am I willing to risk it? Usually. Shawn, I'm sorry that my comment made you have to finally chime in. Don't worry, I'm not trying to start a lying about food allergy revolution or anything. I was just telling Anne Marie what works for me.

*I edited my previous post so that my not feeling well while responding doesn't make me sound like an awful person.

This thread is like a bad car wreck. Why do I keep looking at it? Keep moving along, sir ...

but if i ever thought or found out that someone did something to my food, spit or whatever they do these days. that person would be swimming with the fishes... lol.

Annemarie, you're one of the few people on this forum from whom that threat would give me real trepidation!

One other option to remedy the dreaded "ice in pop" problem might be to lay down a real fat tip next time to you go to one of your regular spots. I think that a server is going to remember you and most likely make a remark to other servers about "that lady who doesn't like ice" being a real good tipper. My guess would be that this gets better mileage than the "Ive got a medical issue" shtick.

You're right about the lack of support system, Marsha. I was terrified of the management. Although I have worked other jobs in restaurants, that job was my first and only serving position, and it lasted exactly 3 months. There was one other server that witnessed what happened, and so this chick would have known who tattled. The atmosphere at this place was such that I would have probably gotten some kind of retribution from one or more other servers. I was a terrible server, and decided to just put my head down and get out of there at the end of the summer. I've always regretted not saying anything.

This thread is like a bad car wreck. Why do I keep looking at it? Keep moving along, sir ...

It's better than American Idol.

#3 - why not simply tell the server the truth - that you hate chives, green onions, parsley and other green things as garnish (and if they get it wrong - Bring it to their attention, so the problem can be corrected) Shawn

I think that in most places in the US, this is probably true. I detested onions when I lived in France, however (I have since developed a strong liking for them - I guess that 7 year thing or whatever), and trust me, I couldn't find a single place anywhere in that country willing to leave onions off anything - if the dish came with onions, by God you were getting onions. Yes, I realize that so much of French cooking, from upscale to rustic, begins with mirepoix.

So I started lying and saying I was allergic - it worked about 80% of the time. I was a much happier resident.

This is patently offensive, and is perfectly indicative of the shift in attitude on this board. This kind of remark is exactly what I was referencing in the Maido thread. Where there used to be a constructive back and forth and attempt to understand both sides of the customer/server relationship, this forum has become a consumer's only forum which is fine, but not a place for trying to understand each other better. So, I bid you farewell. As a server I think it is pretty impossible to have discussions on here anymore without risking a negative effect on my current career. And again, please don't assume a negative or inflammatory tone in this response. I just wanted to voice my opinion on this kind of comment. The only other response I could see in regards to the above post would be, if going out has become so terrible why do you bother to do it five nights a week? Again, not trying to be nasty, but I sincerely wonder why you would bother to continue to support something you feel has gone so badly downhill.

Been gone awhile, and lovin' to stir, and lovin' to watch that stir get ignored, but did no-one read that Jeremy is leaving because of this thread? Why did no one address his point and continue to coddle a headline that would cause ruckus and calling for the head of the writer in a traditional editorial, who would put such a generalization on one segment of our society, on a board that is all about the magnificent cogs of that segment? Did you notice the decline in service at the gas station? The post office? THE TAG AGENCY? I too register my offense at the tone and generalization of the thread topic (and recognize my hypocrisy in bumping said thread) but somebody needs to support the voice of positivity.

Just because people have a tendency to repeat, and relive, and belittle those who caused their tragic event over reiterating the million blessings we get every single day, doesn't make it the road we should try to travel. I am tired about hearing about how grocery stores and high end car dealers are trying to rip some people off. I return to the board after working in this society and see about that, according to one headline, and not allowed to blossom within, all servers just don't listen anymore. Said it before, say it again, lovely manners are much better than a geographic excuse for abrasive comments.

What is the definition of doing the same thing over and over and expecting the same results??? No offense meant, but emotion rides high on this (repeat) problem of negativity in a "foodie" environment. Now I am going back to try to find a rave thread in a board that is a little short on rave threads. Bumps for Spinelli's and Connor's! Somebody share a good time they had this weekend at a place they haven't eaten at before. Prep Magazine has a full page of restaurants that opened each publication, yes chains too, but get on out and tell us about it!

[Robin Garr]

did no-one read that Jeremy is leaving because of this thread? Why did no one address his point

I really like Jeremy, I think he's a great server and an excellent wine geek, and I hope he comes back.

I did not pick up his challenge this time because, when he made a similar statement in the Maido thread, I urged him to reconsider and pointed out that his assertion is flatly incorrect; as, I believe, is your analysis, Reagan. There's a boatload of positive commentary on this forum. There is also plenty of criticism. That's what the forum is now about, has always been about, and ever shall be about.

I hate to see Jeremy leave, but if there's any one thing I've learned over 25 years of moderating online forums, it's that you can't let any member, no matter how valued, blackmail you by threatening to deny us his august presence. I hope Jeremy comes back, but I'm not going to beg. And I'm certainly not going to debase myself by pretending to agree with his position when I feel very strongly that he is mistaken.

This thread has been quiet for almost 10 days. Now you've brought it back to life again. I wonder why you wanted to do that.

i would not say that i am leaving... but as a professional server, i find this thread offensive and just plain annoying. it's troublesome to me that this thread has rambled on with life for over eight pages while a thoughtful and comprehensive review that i posted on Wiltshire on Market a while back didn't receive a single comment. it just shows me that what is interesting to the majority of posters here, isn't what is interesting to me.
i will still pop in occasionally, but i miss the days when i was inclined to read every single comment on every single subject.

Krista,

I think some posts are best judged, if one feels the need to do so, based on the number of times it's read as opposed to the number of comments. I will speculate that this is particularly true of topics which are highly complimentary of dining establishments. Whenever I post a glowing comment about a restaurant I don't expect everyone to flop all over themselves commenting about my experience. I DO hope they will read it and take my comments into consideration the next time a dining option presents itself.

As far as the original topic of conversation...Well what can ya say. This is a public forum and it takes all kinds to make the world go around (God knows I'm the perfect example of that concept). My observation is that a good percentage of the time folks go out of their way either not to identify the particular restaurant following a problematic experience or if they do they are careful to qualify their remarks. Obviously there are exceptions to this generalization.

Personally I don't perceive a lack of acknowledgment to the hard work that servers (etc, etc) do...Quite the contrary most of the time people who post are quite complementary. That being said I (personally) believe it is well within the scope of this forum to identify and openly discuss instances when things don't go right...Just as it is your right to dispute, correct or otherwise qualify complaints when they become personal.

i would not say that i am leaving... but as a professional server, i find this thread offensive and just plain annoying. it's troublesome to me that this thread has rambled on with life for over eight pages while a thoughtful and comprehensive review that i posted on Wiltshire on Market a while back didn't receive a single comment. it just shows me that what is interesting to the majority of posters here, isn't what is interesting to me.
i will still pop in occasionally, but i miss the days when i was inclined to read every single comment on every single subject.

[quote="Steve P"]Krista,

Personally I don't perceive a lack of acknowledgment to the hard work that servers (etc, etc) do...Quite the contrary most of the time people who post are quite complementary. That being said I (personally) believe it is well within the scope of this forum to identify and openly discuss instances when things don't go right...Just as it is your right to dispute, correct or otherwise qualify complaints when they become personal.
[
quote="Steve P"]

thanks for responding, Steve. i hope i don;t come across as saying 'you guys are ganging up on servers.' that's not it. i value annemarie's right to have no ice in her coke. i really do. i'm just not as interested in that as i am interested in what local restaurants are serving and offering and how business is going for them. i was disheartened that when the 21C and Proof(my team) were awarded the honor of number one hotel in the nation by the readers of Conde Nast Traveller, it was mostly dismissed as an error by the CJ and never even brought up again. i have great pride in my city and our restaurant community. i simply miss finding the insider knowledge of that on this forum.

[Robin Garr]

it's troublesome to me that this thread has rambled on with life for over eight pages while a thoughtful and comprehensive review that i posted on Wiltshire on Market a while back didn't receive a single comment.

Two questions, raised by your candid and sincere comments, Krista:

1. Should I "lock" this thread? My general policy of non-censorship goes against it, but sometimes a discussion reaches the point where it's just as well to close it down and invite everyone to go talk about something else.

2. I liked your post about Wiltshire, but - as Steve said well - I tend not to take up people's time with "good post" when there's not much to add. Do folks feel we should change this policy and give a little more time to prop each other up when someone posts a good review?

Personally I was weary of this thread 8 pages ago, but that is really neither here nor there.

I do worry about losing valuable insight and opinions from the likes of Krista and Jeremy. I felt it better to PM Jeremy than post on the thread and I know of at least one other person who did so, unfortunately that looks like indifferencr on the page. But I will now go on record, in public, and say- Please, Krista, keep on visiting and keep your voice on the forum.

And congrats to your team at 21C-I guess the country has caught up with my feeling about the place. I have taken every out of town visitor there since it opened, it is as important to me as anywhere in Louisville. I know that sounds hyperbolic, but I love contempory art and it is a treat to have this resource in our midst. Way to go.